Why I Never Plan To Grocery Shop With Both Of My Children Anytime Soon

I never look forward to grocery shopping, and today was no different. I've been making macaroni & cheese and peanut butter sandwiches for a few days. When that happens, I know it is time to go shopping. It was time, it had to be today or we wouldn't have any milk for tomorrow and I just had to do it. I had to go with the girls because Nate got a call to go to the hospital at the last minute, and he couldn't take care of them. So, I loaded them up and we made our way to our local Safeway.

Shopping with two kids requires some logistical thinking on my part because Jenna always wants to ride in the cart where all the food goes, but gets very upset if I put certain foods in there. She only allows her favorite food in-like the fruit snacks and Dora yogurt. So I always end up shoving way too much stuff on the bottom and next to Abby, who is riding in the front. Letting Jenna walk is not a great option because she either says hi to everyone or takes food off the shelf and throws it in the cart without me looking.

So, for the first time, I resorted to those terrible, terrible monster carts made for more than one child. For those of you who have never pushed one of these, they are regular carts with a big plastic seat attached to the front that has room for two older children to sit on. It's enormous and quite difficult to push. But, I thought I'd try it because the alternatives haven't worked out so well in the past.

I spent the entire time pushing this monster cart through the store, making 8 point turns at the end of each aisle, and trying not to run into the other customers in the store. I wasn't entirely successful though. In the spaghetti sauce aisle, I knocked over four glass jars of sauce that were stacked off to the side. After being embarrased beyond belief and listening to Jenna tell me that I needed to clean up my mess, we escaped to another aisle where no one knew that I was the one that made the big mess.

Close to the end of our journey in the store, we came to the deli. Of course, Abby was getting hungry and crabby and they only had one person working and five people standing in line. I waited for about ten minutes, when Jenna announced she had to go to the bathroom. So, we leave the line and go to this nasty bathroom where I had to hold Abby and hoist Jenna up on the potty at the same time. We get back to the deli line, wait for another ten minutes before the lady in front of us ordered three sub sandwiches and requested that her roast beef be recut from the center and not the ends. We left knowing it would be forever before we got served by the one deli worker.

We get home and as I'm unloading the bags from the car, I notice that Jenna has a fork in Abby's hair. I, of course, freak out about this and then realize that she is imitating Ariel on The Little Mermaid when she finds the fork and thinks it's a brush. I couldn't be mad at her, just explain that Abby could get big owwies if she brushed her hair with a fork.

Going to Safeway with my children has never been a walk in the park, but today takes the cake. When they are all grown up and explaining to their own children that forks aren't for brushing hair, I'll think back to this day and long for it. Maybe. :)