Nineteen Months

19 months old today:)

He Loved Me Before I Decided Who I Was

I teach an online Theology class, and this is what one of my students wrote in an assignment. It really is a simple statement, but one that is so sweet, I had to write about it.

One of my favorite Bible passages is Isaiah 43:1-4
¹ But now, this is what the LORD says—
he who created you, Jacob,
he who formed you, Israel:
“Do not fear, for I have redeemed you;
I have summoned you by name; you are mine.
² When you pass through the waters,
I will be with you;
and when you pass through the rivers,
they will not sweep over you.
When you walk through the fire,
you will not be burned;
the flames will not set you ablaze.
³ For I am the LORD your God,
the Holy One of Israel, your Savior;
I give Egypt for your ransom,
Cush^[a] and Seba in your stead.
⁴ Since you are precious and honored in my sight,
and because I love you,
I will give people in exchange for you,
nations in exchange for your life.

I have royally messed up in my life. There are relationships that are broken that I wish weren't. I yell at my kids sometimes instead of being the loving, graceful mother they need me to be. And I certainly do not always put God first in my life.

In my 35 years of life, I have worked hard to be a good mother, wife, teacher, friend, and child of God. I love Target and Bon Jovi. I secretly want to have a Southern accent and be just like Beth Moore. And I detest crafts. Most definitely. I like to be good at everything I do and get frustrated when I am not (hence the detesting of crafts). Given all those things about me--good and bad, God loved me before I decided who I was. His love isn't contingent on what good things I do or do not accomplish. There is nothing I can do to make Him love me less, because that's how God's love is. His love for me has nothing to do with my merit--and I am incredibly thankful for that.

Who Is This Girl?

That's what I was thinking today as I caught myself in the mirror every time I painstakingly reached my feet on the sit up board at the gym. I mean, really . . . a few months ago, the thought of spending an hour at the gym would have been laughable. I was sure I couldn't even do a push up, let alone spend an hour there.

Then I got this postcard in the mail. It was for a local gym that was offering a great deal for membership. I signed up right away (happy birthday to me, thanks mom!) and knew that I would never survive in a gym without some accountability. So I signed up with a trainer. Apparently the guy I was assigned to generally works with the 35 and older crowd. I now fall into that category:) He wasn't intimidating and didn't push me too hard, but let me tell you . . . I am sore after every appointment with him.

I have been going 3-4 times a week since Christmas and feel like a pro. I know how to use all the machines (although I'd be perfectly happy just staying on the elliptical for the whole time), have lifted weights in the highly intimidating "man weightlifting" section, and have stuck to my routine for over a month now. This is all coming from the girl who pretty much hasn't exercised regularly since college and even that is questionable.

Although I welcome any weight loss, that is not my main goal. I just got to the point where I wanted to feel better. I was so tired all day and just didn't feel good about my body after three babies. I now have some strength in my body and can feel good about the way I look knowing that I am doing my best to stay fit.

During my first day at the gym, my trainer told me that a large percentage of their memberships come from January New Year's resolutions and that 80% of those people never come back after March. I am determined to not be a part of that 80%. For me, this has been a lifestyle change, not something I am just trying out for a while. I love it, I feel better, and am thankful for my experience there.

A New Adventure

In our area, there is this strange phenomenon that I hadn't experienced before: ice rinks in people's backyards. Given the fact that we have lived in many warm weather climates before coming here, it would make sense that this would be completely new to me. Two of our immediate neighbors have their own personal ice rinks built for the winter, and our girls have been invited to skate there many times, so I thought it was time to teach them how to ice skate. So off we went to the public rink downtown and the girls had a blast.

I was so proud of them! At first, they used the walker type bars to help them skate around the edge. Then we progressed to the bars around the rink, and they were skating on their own! We met so many nice people trying to do the same thing we were and definitely plan on spending more time there learning how to skate!